Sigh

Okay i just had one hell of a lecture from my dad. And I think i deserved it 100%.

I have been wanting to leave this job in the longest time. Cos i know working with my family is never a good thing. Not only because of communication. But after working there for so long, i realized i have no self-discipline for myself at all. And i know that i havent been giving my all when working and it isnt fair for the rest. I know all these. And i figured its prolly cos my mind has this mentality that this is a family business, i can be lazy as and when i want to. Fuck myself. Fuck this thinking its fucking off track. Its wrong and i know it but i still do it. Who the fuck do i think am i man? Just cos i dont hear them say any thing doesnt mean they dont talk. I know people talk. I can feel. just cos i am the boss's daughter doesnt make me a big fuck to laze around while the rest are slogging their ass off. Its just not fair for them.

I should've put myself in their shoes and think what would it be like if a young bitch was working for her father under the same company, and then behaving so carelessly. I'd prolly hate her.

I should be finding a job outside since god knows when but you never let me dad, now you're flipping it on me and telling me the shits bound to happen if im working outside. Why didnt you just let me try and let me suffer rather than just telling me all these just to scare me? I know im gna regret not working hard the past how long i've been working here. i am blessed with working with nice people like fya, zya, gl but i'm not working with the right state of mind so theres no point. i really should leave that place before i make the whole world hate me there.

Shall start my resume and find a part time job outside. Experience real shit and stop talking back to my parents. Is it too late?

Who cares im gna try.

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