Holding on to what I haven’t got

“Cause we're living at the mercy of
The pain and the fear
Until we dead it, Forget it,
Let it all disappear.”

So i ‘ve been secretly falling apart lately. Okay maybe when I’m alone too much or I start stoning. Especially when I’m in the car looking out the window with my ipod shuffling to songs I don’t wna hear. Suddenly I’ll find myself orbiting in nonsensical thoughts. Its crazy cos I wish I can tell people around me what’s wrong but everythings’ in jumbled words, scenes, images. Its like flipping the pages of a book so fucking fast you can’t even catch to prioritize what you have to read. &then sometimes when I think of a particular problem my mind seems to drift away subtly telling me to sweep it away and just forget it. See how fucked my head is?

I’m weird.